How to manage the emotional toll of breast cancer

A breast cancer diagnosis often brings a wave of emotions—from shock and sadness to guilt and anxiety. Support resources and coping strategies can help you recognize, share, and process what you’re feeling.

Key takeaways

• The emotional effects of breast cancer are different for everyone, but it’s common to feel shocked, sad, irritable, and other emotions throughout diagnosis, treatment, and recovery.
• Talking to others, saying your emotions out loud, establishing a routine, and staying social can help you cope with a range of feelings.
• Many support resources exist for patients and their caregivers that support emotional health.

When most people think of breast cancer, they imagine the toll it takes on the body. But it often affects your mind, emotions, and even identity. Fortunately, there are many resources available to help support you and all aspects of your health.

What are common emotional responses to breast cancer?

Everyone responds to a cancer diagnosis differently. You might feel one emotion very strongly, or five emotions in the span of a few minutes. It’s common to experience:

• Shock
• Sadness
• Guilt
• Anger
• Irritability
• Fear
• Numbness
• Anxiety
• Racing thoughts

This swell of emotions is normal. At first, your diagnosis may feel surreal. Then, it sort of overwhelms your central nervous system, much like your body responding to a threat. As you go through treatment, these feelings can change.

What are some coping strategies?

While you can’t, and shouldn’t, force all emotions to go away, there are actions you can take to deal with them in healthy ways.

Talk to someone

Most of the time, cancer is unexpected. So, it helps to talk about how this unexpected life event is making you feel. Call on your support system—friends, family, counselors, your care team, community groups, or others.

Sometimes, knowing what to expect can make you feel more at ease. Ask your doctors questions to get the information you need. Share how you’re feeling and when you need help, so they can refer you to the right resources. You can also bring a support person to your appointments, who can help you understand your cancer and how to navigate treatment.

Find ways to express yourself

You may naturally want to avoid more negative feelings, such as sadness or anger. Or, you might feel an unspoken pressure to “stay positive.” However, expressing emotions—especially harder ones—can actually make them easier to let go. Ignoring them often makes them worse.

Try to find ways to share and process your feelings. Consider writing them down or saying them out loud. It might help to fill in the blanks:

• I’m scared about _____.
• I’m sad because_____.
• I’m angry that _____.

Focus on the present

Cancer is the ultimate loss of control. You may feel better when you focus on what you can control about your situation.

Often, establishing a simple, daily routine can help you feel more stable. Take a walk at City Park each morning. Call a friend. Go to bed at the same time each day. The consistency reassures you and your central nervous system that you’re safe.

Your routine can prioritize what makes you feel better, with lifestyle changes that keep you as healthy as possible.

Stay connected to avoid isolation

When you feel anxious or depressed, it’s tempting to withdraw. Social isolation, though, often makes you feel worse. Be intentional about staying connected.

Turn toward, instead of away from, your social networks. If you’re religious, continue to go to services. If you’re in a book club, keep going to book club. If you go to a certain festival each year, go if you feel up for it.

You might also find it helpful to interact with people with similar experiences. Cancer support groups can give you opportunities to connect with other patients or loved ones dealing with cancer.

Support resources for people with breast cancer

Getting the right treatment for breast cancer helps you survive. Support services along the way help you thrive. At LCMC Health, a full team is available to care for your whole health—physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. Some of the support resources we offer include:

• In-depth education about your cancer and treatment
• Nutrition counseling
• Pain management resources
• Physical, occupational, and speech therapy
• Smoking cessation resources
• Social workers to help navigate the journey
• Support groups during treatment and survivorship
• Caregiver support

Cancer is hard for everyone. But we’re here to help. Learn more about Women’s Health and Cancer Care.

Related questions about breast cancer

What are common physical changes from breast cancer?

Breast cancer treatment can change how you look and feel. You may experience hair loss, weight changes, skin changes, pain, scarring, and tiredness. Some of these physical changes are temporary, and some last longer.

Who is most likely to get breast cancer?

You may have a higher risk of developing breast cancer if:

• You have a family history of breast cancer.
• You have had breast cancer before.
• You inherited certain genes, including BRCA1 and BRCA2.
• You have not had children.
• You’ve been exposed to radiation near your chest.
• You are 50 or older.

What is survivor’s guilt?

Survivor’s guilt is a common feeling that affects people who survive cancer. You may feel guilty for different reasons. Some people feel guilty when they survive a condition another person didn’t. You may feel bad about how your condition has affected loved ones. Or, you may feel pressure to live a certain way after surviving cancer.

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